Friday, 21 August 2009

Botanic Beer

50g (2oz) Medowsweet
50g (2oz) Botany
50g (2oz) Agrimony
50g (2oz) Raspberry Leaves (Real Raspberrys make for a better taste!)
25g (1oz) Hyssop
1.2kg (2.5lb) Sugar
9 Litres (2 galls) Water
Ale Yeast or Bakers Yeast.

Boil the leaves (and berries if you have them) in water for 15 minutes. Strain it off and add the Sugar when tepid, stirring the mix if possible to allow the sugar to dissolve, then add the yeast and bottle it in a sterile container, a brewers Jar with a water trap is ideal, if you dont have access to one you can rig a water trap out of a 2 gallon plastic container and if it has a rubber seal at the top you can improvise a water trap, I will follow this post with an example of just such a home made still in photographic form, when time allows.

I made some of this stuff last year and used elder berries and raspberries and once it had sat in the corner of a room squeaking and hissing for three to four week's, it got sampled, several times in fact, until the entire container was drained dry and I slowly went blind, however there was no lasting long term damage, except maybe to my liver.

Sorcerers Possum

Sorcerers Possum

As you have probably gathered by now I am a herbalist and love plants in all there glory.

Willow Bark is a rich source of aspirin, rosemary is good for the gums and even cures gum disease, foxgloves are rich in digitalis which is used in heart medication, never ingest stuff or use stuff if you are unfamiliar with its application as some plants from which we derive most of our modern medicine today are deadly in the wrong applications.

Take my computer handle as an example: Nightshade.. First documented in the Grand Herbier printed in paris in 1504.

A herb that was known by various nicknames during the sixteenth and seventeenth centuries including: Strygium, Strychnon, Solanum somiferum & solatrum mortal better known by the apothecaries name for it which translates from latin: 'Deadly Nightshade.'

All parts of the plant are deadly poison and as such should only be used under medical supervision. It's main constituents are atropine which stops the heart.

But just how deadly is it, well heres an answer, it is one of the most toxic plants in the western hemisphere. As little as three berries can kill a child, ingestion of the leaves can kill an adult. The roots are the most poisonous part of the plant, though this may vary from specimen to specimen and you can spend your entire life looking for one and never lay your eyes upon it, it was said to be a plant that was tended in the night by the devil himself.

Below is a recipe for what was once called Sorcerers Possum, also later known as witches flying ointment, this recipe is documented here for interested parties only, if you go brewing this up and drop down dead, then you are a complete and utter buffoon having been so carefully warned by an experienced apothecary.

3 grams annamthol
30 grams betel
50 grams extract of opium
6 grams cinquefoil
15 grams henbane
15 grams belladonna
15 grams hemlock
250 grams cannabis Indica
5 grams canthreidin

Other recipes included the following plants which should never be used without supervision by a professional herbalist, Aconite (Wolfsbane) Mandragora (Mandrake) Digitalis (Foxgloves) Thorn-apple (the devils apple) Jimson Weed (Datura) Fly Agaric (Amanita Muscaria)

What they did was blend it into goose fat and then applied this to the pulse points located on the temples of the patient, the result is unconsciousness with very lucid and vivid dreaming.

If it was accidentally ingested it would kill you in no time at all, it also soaks into your skin and thus into your bloodstream you would not want to get this stuff on your hands.

Educational Only!

Snacktime Sandwhich for the Brave

Needed Items;

1 x Thick bloomer - loaf of bread (fresh and preferably crusty!)

1 x Tin of Sardines in Tomato Sauce

1 x Bottle of Econda west indian hot chilli sauce.

1 x Slab of full fat irish butter

Cut two thick slices off the bread and wallop them into the toaster, then whilst its toasting, open the sardines, drain off the tomato sauce as it's vile and carefully scrape the outside of the sardines skin to remove any remaining scales (the cheap sardines have them!) open the sardine and remove the bone which runs for the length of the fish (see what I mean about cheap!)

Once the toast pop's up, apply a liberal amount of Salty full fat butter.. If you are trying to lower your carbohydrate intake this is not a sandwich for you!

Apply a thick dollop of the econda chilli hot sauce and smear it around on the toasted bread and scrape the sardines onto the other slice and mash them lightly with a fork, slam both bits of bread together and you can figure out what to do with the Sandwich from there I am sure.

But if in doubt, put it in your mouth and proceed to chew!! Warning, this is HOT due to the pepper sauce and if you dont like hot food, dont try this. Instead stick with the vile tomato sauce!

Total cost of ASDA (Wallmart) value sardines in tomato sauce 24 pence which is about the equivalent of 20 cents.

The bread and butter will set you back two bucks, but if your like me you'll buy them in bulk and fish is extremely good for you and I can even say the same of the HOT sauce, hot scotch bonnet or thai green chili kills 95% of bacteria in your stomach, even the friendly lactalis shirota bacteria.

I have never understood peoples fascination with drinking rubbish like yakult to increase bacteria in the stomach. Why not injest the Noro-Virus and feel the pure agony of having your guts twisted up and after you've spent the whole night spewing, you'll realize the benefits of HOT sauce that kills 95% of all bacteria, including real charmers like the Noro-Virus!

Just because fairy washing up liquid kills germs does not mean you should go ingesting it, seriously peoples weird fascinations with rubbish like low fat diets and eating 5 a day just makes me giggle, if you swallow halibut fish liver oil rich in Vitamin A and drink RED ginseng tea religiously every morning. You will live to a very ripe old age, 5000 year old herbal medicine is far better for you than swallowing a mouthful of live bacteria yogurt.

My first blog!

I have never been one for a lot of writing or literary expressionism, how exciting to start up a blog page about absolutely nothing.

I need to think of stuff to blog, that way it makes for more interesting reading material for any and all unwary visitors that just happen to stumble onto the pages.

I guess the first thing I could blog is how to get the Sony Ericsson's T303 to work on Linux, I went off downloaded BITPIM, then discovered you dont actually need it, you just need a data cable and if your running an up to date copy of Ubuntu Jaunty 9.04 when you plug in the phone, the damn thing pop's up as a mountable file system under Linux by default, so BITPIM was the biggest waste of time ever, soon got removed as I only possess the One phone and unlike most people I do not have an army of the things laying around in cupboard's and draws.

I discovered the Samsung e250v which I had as a previous phone refused to interface with my little linux laptop directly, tried everything I could think of to the point of actually try to mount the device under linux with the mount command and the phone was having none of it. But as luck would have it someone I knew wanted the e250v so I traded them a t303 for it and the t303 seems to love linux and would appear to be a superior phone as it has more camera power. However unlike the e250v it does not have an expandable memory slot. No great loss, down to 7mb of storage space instead of 2Gigabytes.. But worth it in every-way as I can now get Duke Nuke'em onto the phone as it's default ring-tone and set some nice quality custom wallpapers.

Games, armies of video games, for those odd occasions when I am on the move and bored completely to abstraction and have nothing better to do than play some action or shoot'em ups. The phones battery will love that!

I am totally impressed that a Sony phone seems to work flawlessly under Linux with no hassle what so ever and less than impressed with the Samsung e250v which refused to work without some major hack job writing your own drivers for it, apparently working just fine under windows.

Like I am going to un-install everything or load wine so I can interface with the crappy windows API.. Not in my lifetime, thanks all the same Samsung.